Compete with no one but yourself.Dionne Alexander
Do you ever feel like you’re constantly measuring yourself against people you know in real life or people you follow online?
It’s a toxic practice that seems unavoidable most of the time. In a world where success is measured by the number of likes or followers you have, it’s easy to turn a numbers game into a measurement of self-worth, and it’s not. Something I’ve been thinking a lot about for years now but that I’m just now starting to internalize is the fact that value is inherent. I’m going to repeat that: VALUE IS INHERENT. You cannot, as a human being, become more or less valuable based on your characteristics or actions. It’s just not possible.
When you really think about it, it’s incredibly freeing. It reminds me of another quote I feel like I’ve shared on here (not entirely sure, my apologies) by Maggie Nelson. In her book The Argonauts, she says, “Nothing you can say can fuck up the space for God.” That’s a slow burn, isn’t it? I’m going to add to Maggie’s quote and say that nothing you can say or do can fuck up the space for God. That connection, like our inherent value, is irrevocable and impregnable.
There’s an exercise I’d like for all of you to try with me. Every day when you wake up, I want you to find a mirror (the front-facing camera on your phone will work just fine) and repeat these words: “I do not have to earn my value.” The first few times you do this might me awkward and embarrassing, but eventually you’ll come to believe the words you can hear yourself saying. We believe the things we repeat, so repeat good things about yourself to yourself.
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